From ed@hintz.org Thu Aug 1 23:30:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Thu Aug 1 22:30:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] How many dogs? Message-ID: <20020802052936.13605@127.0.0.1:2525> Squirrel Bait gets the credit for this one: HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?   Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb? Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that damned stupid lamp! Rottweiler: Make me. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation. Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark. Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch. Maltese: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark...... Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover..... Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there.... Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares? Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle.... Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb? Shih-tzu:  Puhleeze.  Do you think I'm going to do anything so menial? I'll let the Miniature Schnauzer and Lhasa Apso TRY to figure it out while I sit here on the couch & be entertained.  Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz.z.z.z..z..z..z...z Cat: Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So the question is: How long will it be before I can expect light? From ed@hintz.org Sun Aug 4 13:25:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Sun Aug 4 12:25:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Monkey business Message-ID: <20020804192421.28173@127.0.0.1:2525> Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 5 14:41:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 5 13:41:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Pavorotti loves Elephants Message-ID: <20020805204058.989@127.0.0.1:2525> Sooz gets the credit for this gem: Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 5 15:29:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 5 14:29:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] GI Joe disarmed by LAX security Message-ID: <20020805212847.2181@127.0.0.1:2525> After being relieved of his 2" toy M16 the action figure was not detained and was allowed to board his scheduled flight to London, where the grandson who was to recieve the toy was quoted as saying "Don't those people understand the gun was a toy?" Perhaps LAX should hire the 7 year old. He's got more common sense than the security screeners, it would seem. Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Tue Aug 6 14:33:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Tue Aug 6 13:33:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] New SUV Message-ID: <20020806203159.26856@127.0.0.1:2525> Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Wed Aug 7 00:47:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Tue Aug 6 23:47:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Leonard Nimoy's tribute to Bilbo Message-ID: <20020807064633.27959@127.0.0.1:2525> Thanks to Brooke for the heads up on this one: Quoted from : >Side Two features one of the most amazing artifacts ever committed to >vinyl: "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins". Not satisfied with his musical >disembowling of the most popular sci-fi series of all time, Mr. Nimoy >turned his substantial talents towards the works of an elderly British >fantasy literature writer. > >In the course of the 2 minutes 18 seconds of horror that follow, not only >is the plot of the entire novel given away but Nimoy knowingly lets the >listener in on what Bilbo is really smoking in his pipe down in that >wacky hobbit-hole. There is also a bassoon solo. Having gotten the description out of the way, here's the video in technicolor glory. Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 12 14:28:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 12 13:28:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Biggart's last photos Message-ID: <20020812202718.26553@127.0.0.1:2525> Bill Biggart was a photojournalist who died when the 2nd WTC tower fell on him. He was carrying 2 film cameras and one digital, the violence of the destruction wasted his film, but the memory stick in his digtal camera survived. The photos get progressively closer to the WTC until his last shot, which is about 90 seconds before bldg2 fell on him. http://digitaljournalist.org/issue0111/biggart_intro.htm His last: http://digitaljournalist.org/issue0111/biggart21.htm Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Fri Aug 16 22:45:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Fri Aug 16 21:45:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Economic Forum Message-ID: <20020817044414.25614@127.0.0.1:2525> http://intoon.com/Keefe/k1808.gif Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 26 12:11:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 26 11:11:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Sometimes spam is fun... Message-ID: <20020826181029.6035@127.0.0.1:2525> A choice selection from this mornings inbox: >Date: Mon, 26 Aug 2002 16:05:55 +0800 >To: ed@hintz.org >Subject: ed,Do you want men to look at you? > >================================= > >Guaranteed to increase, lift and firm your >breasts in 60 days or your money back!! > >100% herbal and natural. Proven formula since >1996. Increase your bust by 1 to 3 sizes within 30-60 >days and be all natural. > >Click here: > > >Absolutely no side effects! >Be more self confident! >Be more comfortable in bed! >No more need for a lift or support bra! > >100% GUARANTEED AND FROM A NAME YOU KNOW AND >TRUST! > > >************************************************** > >You are receiving this email as a double opt-in >subscriber to the Standard Affiliates Mailing >List. >To remove yourself from all related email lists, >just click here: So whadda ya say folks, think more men would look at me if I increase my bust 1-3 sizes? ;-D Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Sat Aug 31 10:27:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Sat Aug 31 09:27:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Weapons of mass distraction Message-ID: <20020831162557.25317@127.0.0.1:2525> Along those lines, Marjorie sent along a online petition against another Iraq Attack: Dunno how much good it'll do, studies have shown that generally online petitions are not often effective, but if the organizers behind this one actually do print it out and deliver it there could be a tangible result. And this one won't be very funny unless you know who Dr. Phil is, but if you do it's great: Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Thu Aug 1 23:30:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Thu Aug 1 22:30:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] How many dogs? Message-ID: <20020802052936.13605@127.0.0.1:2525> Squirrel Bait gets the credit for this one: HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?   Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb? Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that damned stupid lamp! Rottweiler: Make me. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation. Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark. Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch. Maltese: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark...... Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got this hangover..... Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there.... Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares? Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle.... Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb? Shih-tzu:  Puhleeze.  Do you think I'm going to do anything so menial? I'll let the Miniature Schnauzer and Lhasa Apso TRY to figure it out while I sit here on the couch & be entertained.  Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz.z.z.z..z..z..z...z Cat: Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So the question is: How long will it be before I can expect light? From ed@hintz.org Sun Aug 4 13:25:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Sun Aug 4 12:25:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Monkey business Message-ID: <20020804192421.28173@127.0.0.1:2525> Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 5 14:41:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 5 13:41:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Pavorotti loves Elephants Message-ID: <20020805204058.989@127.0.0.1:2525> Sooz gets the credit for this gem: Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 5 15:29:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 5 14:29:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] GI Joe disarmed by LAX security Message-ID: <20020805212847.2181@127.0.0.1:2525> After being relieved of his 2" toy M16 the action figure was not detained and was allowed to board his scheduled flight to London, where the grandson who was to recieve the toy was quoted as saying "Don't those people understand the gun was a toy?" Perhaps LAX should hire the 7 year old. He's got more common sense than the security screeners, it would seem. Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Tue Aug 6 14:33:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Tue Aug 6 13:33:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] New SUV Message-ID: <20020806203159.26856@127.0.0.1:2525> Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Wed Aug 7 00:47:01 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Tue Aug 6 23:47:01 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Leonard Nimoy's tribute to Bilbo Message-ID: <20020807064633.27959@127.0.0.1:2525> Thanks to Brooke for the heads up on this one: Quoted from : >Side Two features one of the most amazing artifacts ever committed to >vinyl: "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins". Not satisfied with his musical >disembowling of the most popular sci-fi series of all time, Mr. Nimoy >turned his substantial talents towards the works of an elderly British >fantasy literature writer. > >In the course of the 2 minutes 18 seconds of horror that follow, not only >is the plot of the entire novel given away but Nimoy knowingly lets the >listener in on what Bilbo is really smoking in his pipe down in that >wacky hobbit-hole. There is also a bassoon solo. Having gotten the description out of the way, here's the video in technicolor glory. Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 12 14:28:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 12 13:28:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Biggart's last photos Message-ID: <20020812202718.26553@127.0.0.1:2525> Bill Biggart was a photojournalist who died when the 2nd WTC tower fell on him. He was carrying 2 film cameras and one digital, the violence of the destruction wasted his film, but the memory stick in his digtal camera survived. The photos get progressively closer to the WTC until his last shot, which is about 90 seconds before bldg2 fell on him. http://digitaljournalist.org/issue0111/biggart_intro.htm His last: http://digitaljournalist.org/issue0111/biggart21.htm Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Fri Aug 16 22:45:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Fri Aug 16 21:45:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Economic Forum Message-ID: <20020817044414.25614@127.0.0.1:2525> http://intoon.com/Keefe/k1808.gif Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Mon Aug 26 12:11:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Mon Aug 26 11:11:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Sometimes spam is fun... Message-ID: <20020826181029.6035@127.0.0.1:2525> A choice selection from this mornings inbox: >Date: Mon, 26 Aug 2002 16:05:55 +0800 >To: ed@hintz.org >Subject: ed,Do you want men to look at you? > >================================= > >Guaranteed to increase, lift and firm your >breasts in 60 days or your money back!! > >100% herbal and natural. Proven formula since >1996. Increase your bust by 1 to 3 sizes within 30-60 >days and be all natural. > >Click here: > > >Absolutely no side effects! >Be more self confident! >Be more comfortable in bed! >No more need for a lift or support bra! > >100% GUARANTEED AND FROM A NAME YOU KNOW AND >TRUST! > > >************************************************** > >You are receiving this email as a double opt-in >subscriber to the Standard Affiliates Mailing >List. >To remove yourself from all related email lists, >just click here: So whadda ya say folks, think more men would look at me if I increase my bust 1-3 sizes? ;-D Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org From ed@hintz.org Sat Aug 31 10:27:02 2002 From: ed@hintz.org (Edmund A. Hintz) Date: Sat Aug 31 09:27:02 2002 Subject: [Promotum] Weapons of mass distraction Message-ID: <20020831162557.25317@127.0.0.1:2525> Along those lines, Marjorie sent along a online petition against another Iraq Attack: Dunno how much good it'll do, studies have shown that generally online petitions are not often effective, but if the organizers behind this one actually do print it out and deliver it there could be a tangible result. And this one won't be very funny unless you know who Dr. Phil is, but if you do it's great: Peace, Edmund A. Hintz **|** "You may say I'm a dreamer, Mac Techie, Unix Geek, * | * But I'm not the only one... Mac/Unix Consultant * /|\ * I hope someday you'll join us, */ | \* And the world will live as one. '78 Westy ***** Imagine." http://www.hintz.org